Feed Your Children to the Sea
by becuze
Summary: When trivial pursuits are just so trivial, and trivial answers to trivia questions are more then just trivia and in a world of possibilities and schemes, isn't it easier just to fight for your own? AkuRoku, Rated M for possible later chapters.
1. Starbucks

**A/N: My first story on fanfiction! Reviews are greatly appreciated!!**

Babe Ruth.

Yeah, that's right. Babe Ruth.

I don't know much about the man except for he was a great baseball player who played for the Boston Red Sox. I'm sure you probably know more than me. He _is_ a very famous man after all.

Now, lotta old farts will argue that the men who make discoveries in science will be the most famous people on earth. More famous than any actor/sport's star/rock star. But in all honesty, who will remember the men who discovered the structure of DNA or invented the first microscope.

Do any names such as Robert Hooke, Johann Kepler, or Francis Bacon ring many bells to you?

Hell! Babe Ruth was so famous he has a friggen candy bar named after him. A candy bar!

I know, I know, hold your horses. I'm getting there. I abso-fucking-lutely swear there's a reason behind all this mumbo jumbo crap.

Yeah, so my dad. He's a scientist. A rocket scientist. Ho-ho-ho, impressed ya huh? No? Well who gives a flying fuck?

So my rocket scientist dad's name is Kirk Oddit. Does that sound familiar?

Didn't think so.

And when I refer to old farts, I usually and on most occasions am referring to the very same man. Kirk Oddit. The man who told me all this in the first place. About how scientists will be remember forever because they will be in every text book across the nation. You know. The kinda text book that you stick your gum in between the pages of 'cause you have no where else to hide it. Yeah those kind. And ever since I was five he's been setting me up to be a great rocket scientist like him. Of course back then I thought my pops was a super hero.

But god knows I ain't got the smarts to be a rocket scientist. My dad figured that out too when I barely passed ninth grade. Not to mention when I dropped out in my junior year.

But Roxas. As soon as I had laid eyes on the kid I knew he wasn't going to be the next Kirk Oddit or Babe Ruth. He was gonna be big big. Yes big big.

And that can be a hard accomplishment for someone so small, but he was determined. He wanted to make a difference, he wanted be famous, he wanted to make unbelievable discoveries that only so many scientists could make in a life time. That kid was a prodigy, a genius.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves. We're not quite there yet.

Where we really are is at my studio. Okay, so it's not a studio. It's my cousin's garage. But it's not like Yuffie actually owns a car or has anything better to do with it. She's too green to own a car… so she rides the bus. Almost makes me laugh. And I probably would if I wasn't sucking up all her O2 in her garage.

"Hey, you staying for dinner tonight Axel?" She leaned in cautiously from the doorway. Of course you had to be weary in my workspace, never know what I might be throwing at a canvas that might just _slip _and hit you in the noggin.

"Nah, I need to be taking off, "I groaned standing from the work bench. I checked my watch and my eyes nearly popped out of my skull. Eight hours. Eight hours I've been here. I was in desperate need of a life.

"You sure? It's pretty late.'"

I just waved to her and ducked under the garage door and pulled it back down after me. I had been eating Yuffie's cooking enough lately, someone can only handle so much. Makes you wonder how her boyfriend works around it. Then again, she never could keep a man for very long.

Why I evaluating my cousin's love life that night I'll never know.

:o:o:o:

Finding the right key to slip into my lock led to plenty of curses which most likely woke up and most definitely provoked quite a few neighbors that lived in the same apartment building. But thank goodness my savior, and roomie, had come to, well, save me. On account of that's what most saviors do.

"Good god Axel. Where the 'ell 'ave you been?" Might I add that his British accent was plenty irritating at this late of an hour. Of course if I had come back earlier, then maybe I wouldn't have Luxord in my _bloody _face.

I just pushed past the blondie and made my way to our couch and proceeded to fall back on and make a relieved groan in the process.

"Out."

He frowned at me. And I have to admit I wasn't vey pleased with this ugly frown. I would rather like to take his _bloody_ British teapot and smash it over his _bloody _British head and deport him back to _bloody _England. But unfortunately this teapot was in the top covered in the kitchen, and with that being quite a few feet away, and with me being as lazy as a stubborn mule, I would just have to face his ugly frown with my own to match.

So his ugly little frown and him came and sat on the arm rest of the chair across from me. They did not match very well. We had gone to the furniture store that Sunday because they were having a sale. And a sale's a sale right? And we were probably lucky enough to find anything this good at all. No matter how ugly they were, which at the moment looked better than the expression my so called savior was giving me.

"Axel, we need to talk." He said in a loud voice as if he was announcing something.

"You're not breaking up with me are you?" I taunted him in a high pitched girl voice, laughing at his clichéd words.

"Look. This month's rent is coming up and you still 'aven't paid last month's." His tone was more serious now and I just gave him a solemn look.

"Hey, I'm working on it. My stuff is gonna make big money soon, I can feel it! Now if you don't mind?" I turned and buried my head back into the couch cushions.

"Axel. I really don't think we can trust your instinct. I need to know if you will 'ave the money. Larxene is-"

"Oh! Oh! This makes all the difference!" I was now sitting up to address my dear buddy ol' boy. "Larxene is a skanky control freak. Ever wonder why you and I were such good friends in high school? Before you met her in college?"

A few low insults here, stuttered blows there, and a couple of wrong accusations and '_bloody 'ell_''s later I was hiking up the road with a backpack hitched over my shoulders and a duffel bag in hand.

So where does one go at eleven o' clock at night in Seattle when they have all their belongings in one hand? Two words:

Star-bucks.

Coffee was really the only thing on my mind at the moment. That and wondering what in the world a Starbuck was.

:o:o:o:


	2. MobyDick

A/N: I do not own Kingdom Hearts!

* * *

So what?

I dropped out of high school. Yeah, I get it; it's a bit _'no no'_. My parents said the same thing, maybe not in those words, but just about. I'm pretty sure I can read your mind right about now.

What a moron, did he have a social disability?

And I can tell you proudly no. I can't tell you I'm completely mentally stable. Well I could, but that would be a lie. And I would like to clarify that I am **not** a liar.

But besides the mad obsession with fire, there could be something wrong, not that I would know or even notice. I just wasn't one of those kids for school. It just wasn't for me. And when I was seventeen I was as sure as I am now that spending my life in a cubicle hunched over a computer was _definitely_ not for me.

Now I'm not saying I was the smartest kid or a genius, but I wasn't dumb if that's what you wanted to know. I was pretty average, in fact I was a pretty average kid with an average life and average friends. Just… lazy ya' know?

Or maybe I wasn't so average? Don't most kids finish high school with the whole cap and gown to prove it? Well I _can _assure you that I'm nothing special, because _I'm _not a liar.

With that being said I can now say that I had enough common sense to know that the kid did not look like he belonged behind a cash register in a too cozy for comfort coffee shop going by some crack name of Starbucks in a wonderfully crack city called Seattle. And that's the truth.

"16 ounce coffee, black." I said to the blondie who stared quite intensely at me before he rang me up. I fumbled clumsily in my pockets for cash to pay for the overpriced coffee. I was pretty sure the weird look he gave me as he poured the liquid into a cup was due to the fact that I was the only one in the shop and probably the only one who's crazy enough to get coffee at eleven o' clock at night.

Yeah, that and my absolutely amazing hair.

He put the holder on and set the cup down for me and I of course set down my handful of change on the counter. Money is money.

He raised his little eyebrows and gave me a 'your-kidding-right?' look. And I just stared back nonchalantly waiting for him to count it up. Not like he or I had anything better to do. So he sighed and started to pull quarters and dimes towards him with his index fingers. His lips moved softly counting to himself.

"So, how's _your _day?" I then gave him a shit eating grin that was just as cheesy as that question. Maybe I was a cruel sadistic person that purposely talked to someone after giving them a handful of change to count just to watch them get all confused and scrunch up there face in frustration while I rambled on. Or maybe I was just friendly. Either way he didn't lose track as he said:

"Fine. Yours?"

"Fucking dandy." I answered back. His tone was dull; he probably wouldn't even be talking to me if it wasn't for the coffee shop's policies. "And why is one such as yourself, out at such a late hour?" Or maybe I was just an ass.

"…um, working."

"Not much of a conversationalist. I'm hurt that you're not making any effort."

He sighed and was silent before mumbling "Okaaaay… Why do you have so much stuff with you?"

"Just got kicked out of my apartment." I was already tired of waiting for him to hurry up and count so I took up the coffee and took a long sip.

"Why," he drawled on pretending to be interested.

I turned and rest my elbows against the counter to lean on. "Roomie's girlfriend is a total bitch."

"Oh dear." He said sarcastically letting his eyes widen in that sarcastic way. Right about now is when several realizations dawned on me. First, this blondie was boring. He was just a very average teen, more average then myself, and with an attitude problem. Second, I really shouldn't waste my time with someone who isn't going to make my life anymore interesting and especially when it was so obvious I wasn't wanted there (but I never was one who cared). Lastly, where the hell was I going to sleep tonight?

But instead of putting my lazy ass into motion I just shrugged and turned around to face the kid. He finally finished counting by then and was putting the change in the right departments. I collected the rest in one hand and threw it in his tip jar, even though I really didn't think he deserved it.

"Well, Rrrr-" I leaned over the counter to check his name tag better, "-oxas!" He sighed boringly, tilted his head to one side to glare at me waiting for whatever random nonsense could spew out of my mouth.

Roxas had always said I was full of crap, and when I opened my mouth that's all that ever came out. Probably the reason why he used to call me such childish names like ass face. Huh, don't believe me? I told you I never lied right? Well ask him yourself, he'll tell you.

Anyways, as my newly acquainted friend stared at me rather tiredly I took advice from myself for once and beat it. "See ya' round kid." Of course when I said that I had actually thought I was likely to never see this kid again.

I thought Roxas was some nobody, another stranger, another face. Just a small part of my life I probably wouldn't even remember a year from now. A trip to a coffee shop, that's all it was, and playing games with some poor kids head.

I also thought Roxas was average.

Oh how wrong I can be.

That night I just checked into some cheap motel, the one I usually take my one night stands to. Yeah, that one. Where everything smells like its molding and the plumbing is as ancient as the tacky furniture. Except this time the room was for one, and I spent one cold and lonely night alone in moldy, tacky motel room. And I can tell you, it didn't seem quite as fun when your partner is probably still at the bar, drunk, and hitting up some other guys to get some.

Yeah, buckets of fun.

The next day I decided to go to Yuffie's house. Well actually I laid in bed for an extra three hours and then took my good slow time getting ready before catching the bus. By the time I did finally get there it was already past eleven. She and her weirdo boyfriend must have been out shopping or some other obvious task. So I let myself in with her spare key she kept under her ridiculously ugly garden gnomes. The ones she kept because she swore they would take over the world and she wanted to be among their allies when they did. I mean, I think she's joking… buuut, there's always this chance with Yuffie. You never know with that girl, she'll weave some notion together and she won't ever let it go. Like the time when I was eleven and she was so sure that boys were from mars.

So I entered her home tossed the spare keys on her dining table and headed straight to the garage. Of course with a pit stop at her kitchen to fuel myself because I didn't have any money to get some breakfast. I had given it all to that damn blonde kid at the coffee shop last night.

With a ham and cheese sandwich in hand I made my way to her garage. Let the madness proceed.

It was about four hours later when I heard the front door open. Yuffie must have been back with her man carrying bags of stuff that he most probably bought her.

As I was mixing some paints together is when she peeked her head through the door with the spare keys in her hands.

"Oh good. Just you."

"Hey. I got kicked out of my apartment, don't mind if I crash here for a while do you?" I was ever so blunt with her.

"What? Why?"

"The bitch of the west rolled in." Didn't matter if she knew what I was saying or not. That part mostly didn't concern her. As long as I wasn't on a hit list or on the run from the fuzz all was good.

"Well, are you going to do anything about it? Do you have a plan?" She stepped into the garage more and placed the back of her hands on her hips.

"Yeah, next week, my art. Its all gonna go, and some sweet moola will be coming my way."

"C'mon Axel! I think its time to get serious. Get off your lazy ass and get a job. Art may be important to you, but you can't support yourself on painting alone right now."

Oh Yuffie. Going off and thinking she was so wise. But I just gave her a half-hearted smile and shrugged.

Yuffie wasn't too pleased by my response and said: "Fine you can stay." I smiled gratefully and was about to thank her when she added "but," and oh god how I hated buts.

"You must start searching for a job…. Starting now."

What was she? My mom? "Oh c'mon Yuffie." I tried to reason with her but she just plugged her ears childishly and shook her head before marching back into the house.

And let more madness pursue.

My first idea was a tattoo artist. I wasn't sure who would take me due to the tattoos under both eyes, but if I was a tattoo artist that could solve everything. But then I figured that I'd probably poke an eye out with the gun….. Ew.

Without a high school diploma it really left me hanging., which was why I became an artist. No cubicles, no stupid schools, unless you were super super serious. However, making it as a painter was tough. And Yuffie was right, I needed to get a real job until my art did finally take off, if it ever did that is.

After begging some cash off of Yuffie I spent the rest of the afternoon trekking up and down the city searching for almost anything, as long as it didn't include flipping burgers. My luck was pretty poor unfortunately. I mean if you believe in luck, fate, destiny, or any of that crap. I was out there for hours, and if you have never been to Seattle I can tell you that it's a jungle. So I turned in after eight and headed to the bar to make a toast to myself on how my life officially sucks right about now. My art was going nowhere, I didn't have a job, and really I didn't have much of a place to call my own. Now I don't usually complain so on that night it was probably the watered down booze talking.

And if you do believe in luck, fate, or destiny you could say that mine was very good that night. On my hike back to the nearest bus stop what did I happen to cross? Here's a hint:

Two words.

Starbucks was unusually empty, of course it being eleven o' clock at night, that would probably be usual then right? And what especially good luck/fate/destiny did I have, little ol' blondie sat at the cash register giving me a look of unbelief.

"Can I help you," he sighed drowsily.

"What I can't figure out is why keep working this late shift when it makes you so tired."

"Does poor college student mean anything?"

"Well sure it does. It probably means your some cocky bastard who thinks he's all special cause his mommy and daddy paid his way through college, and now your sitting here, alone, in an overrated coffee shop with a drug induced name. Starting to regret being a smarty pants huh?"

Roxas stared blankly at me for a second. Very blank. Then twitched an eyebrow, blinked and sighed. "Can I help you?"

"Yes. Are there any openings for a job here?"

In just three days I was trained to make the ever mighty Starbucks pollution that the population likes to code name as coffee. On the crew there was Demyx, a rather melodious if not annoying and hyper active team member, Tidus, young and overly confident, Kairi, younger than me but enjoyable company, kinda plain, and lastly was Rikku, a blonde girl about my age who was just as crazy and hyper as Demyx. All of which were pretty okay by me. All of which were in college.

My hours were from seven to three. Rikku would usually be there in the morning and at twelve she would switch out with either Kairi or Demyx. Rikku was always bright and shiny every day and all day, probably why she had to get up so early because most customers at the time would be grouchy gusses. I never really worked with Tidus or Roxas. But that never really bothered me, I didn't know Tidus to well, and I could probably say the same thing about Roxas, but I think I was relieved not to have to work with that kid. Roxas was so boring and plain. Spending time with Rikku or Demyx was oh so much more amusing.

And that's what thought then.

Okay, so I now have to admit that Starbucks isn't quite a _drug induced _name. Yeah that's right, I went home and did my homework (for once in my life). Now the question really isn't 'what is a Starbuck?' its 'who is Starbuck?' And I'll tell you just who Starbuck was. Ever read the book _Moby-Dick. _Yeah, ha ha funny name, good now that that's out of our system: Starbuck was the first mate of their merry little ship called the _Peequod. _Makes you happy they didn't call it Peequod huh?

So now we know _who _Starbuck was but why did they name it the first mate from _Moby-Dick_? I have no goddamn clue. But you do know where Starbucks originated right? No? Wow you poor deprived little people. Starbucks came from right here in good ol' Seattle. In Pike Place Market to be exact, and if you ever do make it to my happy little city I suggest visiting there. It's a pretty cool place.

There's a lot of other tids and bits I know about Seattle, but I think our little history lesson is over.

Oh, you thought there was a point to my little rant? Well I'm sorry to disappoint you but there ain't. But hey, look your this much smarter at trivia. You can thank me later.

* * *

"Hurry up Axel!" Kairi hissed at me in a whisper as I hurriedly ran my hands through the process of using the espresso machine. It was three, the exact time when every worker around our block took a cigarette break and a coffee. I was supposed be off already but Tidus wasn't here to take my shift and I wasn't going to leave Kairi here to fend for herself.

"Chill baby, I'm working on it."

And that's how almost every day went. And most days after work I would go and collapse on Yuffie's couch. Sure I wanted to get my own apartment, don't you think I'm tired of hearing Yuffie, my cousin, scream all night long accompanied by the head board that would rhythmically bang against the wall. Yeah. Didn't think so. I would go get my own apartment, but unfortunately even with my new job I still didn't have enough money to rent out any of the apartments around here. So in the mean time my number one priority, other than my painting, was to find a new roomie that would live up to my standards.

But today was different; I wasn't planning on crashing on Yuffie's couch and daydreaming about how wonderful my life could have been. Today, Xigbar was in the city. One of my only friends I still stayed in touch with after high school. Well other then Luxord, but we can rule him out now on account of him breaking the 'bros before hoes' rule. Right? So yes, Xigbar was back from some business trip. What kind of business he did was none of your business. I'm pretty damn sure it wasn't any of my business either. However I did know that he had very many different jobs and I'm sure that more then half, if not all, of them were illegal.

"What a twat!"

"Geez, cool it Xigbar. Remember our conversation about what we can and can't say in public."

"He totally dumped you for Larxene. She's not even that hot." Xigbar silently cursed himself for not seeing how tight of a leash Larxene had been pulling on that dog Luxord.

"It's cool. Yuffie's letting me crash at her place for a while. I got a job, and now I just need a new roomie."

"You could stay with me. I'm gone half the time anyways and I need someone to look after it while I'm away, and all you have to do is pay half the rent." Maybe for Xigbar this sounded like a great idea, but I secretly wanted a roomie not only to pay half the rent but so I wasn't so lonely all the time. Someone to come home to. Not to mention the crazy whores that always showed up drunk and angry at Xigbar's door in the middle of the night, just girls from past one night stands looking for either commitment or revenge. Mostly the latter of the two.

I just laughed in his face and said: "The last thing I need is for one of your crazy girls to come at me with a knife."

Xigbar chuckled hoarsely and said "At least your ex-girlfriends are sane." I laughed a little too but the sudden mention of her was enough to make the wound start bleeding, like molten lave churning under my skin, still hungry for her.

Our awkward laughed died down slowly until we were completely silent in the sushi bar. The place was darkly lit and other couples and groups were strung here and there. Of course I couldn't afford this place and that was why dinner was on Xigbar. We were still waiting for a few of his friends to show. Leon and Xaldin, and thank god one of them came in to break this awkwardness. However Xigbar did throw me an apologetic look which I dismissed immediately with an easy and natural smile.

* * *

"Yuffie?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you ever been in love?"

"What the hell? Axel you're so weird…"

* * *

That night as I stretched myself lazily across Yuffie's couch, and almost sound asleep when there was a loud buzzing from the side table where my cell was plugged in to charge. I flipped open the annoying, vibrating, godforsaken invention to find a text message from an unknown number.

_?: Hey its Tidus i have a date tomorrow night can u switch shifts with me?_

Now my first thought was how the hell did Tidus get my number?! Then I realized that he could have easily gotten it from Rikku or Kairi because they had stormed me the first day of work demanding that they know my number. Most guys would love to be tackled by women but they can be annoying as hell after consuming too much caffeine. I replied to his request anyways.

_Axel: Yeah whatever_

I then added his number to my contact list. Might as well, I'll need a favor back of course. 'Cause I'm just that kind of a guy.

I also was a bit thankful for the switch; it gave me plenty time to sleep in. I arrived at three in the afternoon to take Tidus's shift just as he was getting off my shift. Things got pretty hot around four and five, the time when people finally got of work and knew that they had to some how manage to stay awake for the kiddies at home. Poor bastards.

At six Kairi took off and half an hour later a certain blonde came in.

"Your late."

"Where's Tidus?" He ignored me.

"He's got a very important date I guess and asked to switch shifts with him."

"With who?" But he just waved away the question, neither of us probably knew her… or him. I wasn't entirely sure what way Tidus swung, then again I've never really had a conversation with the guy.

Roxas came behind the counter and tied his green apron around his waste and pinned his name tag on. After that he leaned over the counter by the cash register and prepared for what we both were going to have to endure. Well mostly him, I was done here at ten. Either way the long hours came.

What happened? Nothing, really nothing happened. I swear to god. It was just boring, except for when the drunkard came and Roxas had to ask him to leave. I didn't really care to do much. I thought it was pretty damn amusing watching Roxas helplessly deal with him. But it wasn't like anyone really came at this hour so why bother. Roxas probably figured that out too but was doing it more for himself rather than the shop.

Yeah, I learned a lot about silent little Roxas without him having to even tell me. You can call it creepy but observation's all it took. Which was easy enough for me because Tidus insisted that I take his shift every Friday night. I would have said no if I had a life, but we went over that right?

There were several things to say about this kid:

1) Roxas liked the quiet, he seethed in it.

2) Roxas wasn't a dumbass, and he didn't like to mess around. He was a pretty quick kid.

3) Roxas hated Starbucks.

All of which added up to an almost complete opposite of me. Nonetheless I stored this information for a better timing.

On the fourth Friday I had switched out with Tidus I took my knowledge and put it to use. When I had finished wiping down the tables I decided to strike.

"Hey Roxie!" I leaned on the opposite side of the counter from him and oh boy, if looks really could kill I'd be a dead man. He gave me the most disgruntled and disturbed face I have ever seen. That face had definitely been scarred into the back of my mind for a very long time.

"Please Axel, my name's Roxas."

"Okay, Okay Francis." He then gave me an even weirder look but I ignored it and continued with my procedure. "So, what does someone like you do in your free time?"

He then gave me _another _weird look before saying "What _can_ a poor college student do?"

"Right, right." I replied like I actually took an interest and then said "So do you stay up in the dorms?"

"No, I'm sharing an apartment with a friend right now." He was watching the dark streets and the occasional passerby that would illuminate under the single streetlamp outside the glass doors.

"Hmm, who?" I asked absentmindedly while turning the coffee mugs about.

"Just a friend. But it feels more like three people in our apartment, his girlfriend practically _lives_ with us."

"And you don't like her because…"

He dumped his face into his palms and made an alarming groaning sound. "Its not that I don't like her, its just I don't like them together."

"Oh dear, am I detecting some jealousy? Scandal!" I called in a dramatic voice.

"No," He said rubbing his temple, already I was annoying him, "They just get mushy lovey gushy ya' know?" I raised an eyebrow to push him over the edge. "Just forget it." He then sighed and continued to people watch.

I let a silence pass over before speaking again. "You know…" I let it drawl to grab his attention. Exasperated he turned towards me. "If you ever need a new roomie I'm free." I gave him the widest grin that showed every single tooth in my mouth just about, maybe it looked a little fierce, well let's hope not.

That little bastard just stared, and stared, and stared. Then his shoulders began to shake and it was followed by a burst of laughter. I let my grin fade as he laughed maniacally. Thanks for nothing you little shit.

"Ha! I barely even know you!"

"All the better reason to move in together!" I strode over to the counter and leaned in so close our faces were inches away. He was trying to hide his smile that still remained from his fit of laughter.

"All the better reason **not** to move in together."

"Hey! Look at it this way. You need a new roomie -"

"I never said I needed a new roomie."

"- and I just need a roomie. Easy enough?"

Once again he was silent and staring at me like I was five-year-old who just denied eating the dessert with chocolate all over his face.

"No. As long as I have worked with you all you are is annoying. Why on earth should I agree to live with you?!"

"Cause your life is boring and it sucks and you know it."

* * *

Five days. In just five days Roxie and I agreed on the price and place. I packed up my duffel bag and backpack from Yuffie's, which was pretty easy on the fact that I never unpacked, and dropped it off. Of course we had to borrow Yuffie's boyfriend's truck to pick up the half of the furniture that definitely belonged to me.

"So someone out there is actually willing to put up with you?" Went Luxord.

"Yup." Went I.

It felt good to finally be out of that house. To be on my own again. I was thankful for what Yuffie did, but you can only handle so much right?

Secretly I think Roxas was thankful to be away from his friend's painfully romantic evenings with his girlfriend. Maybe he was happy with the time we had spent together. I never thought it was a waste of time, not once. My time in that two bedroom apartment was the best of my life. And I could only hope Roxas thought the same. 'Cause then I could have finally done something right with my life. Something right _for_ Roxas. 'Cause god knows I tend to screw up everything.

And that's the truth, 'cause I don't lie.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading. Reviews are greatly appreciated!


	3. The Spice Girls

Sorry it took so long for me to upload. I hope none of you have forgotten about my little story, but I wouldn't blame you if you did.

I do not own Kingdom Hearts!

* * *

As you and I both know, and that I have agrued, I wasn't a dumb kid. Maybe not super genius, but definitely not the poor retard in the corner. I never once had to wear the dunce hat… but I never got an A either. And yes there are some very brilliant children out there, and some very… not so brilliant. But whether we knew about the yellow snow or not, we all made stupid mistakes when we were young.

We all have said some pretty stupid things when we were young too. Like when Yuffie wanted to be a ballerina/veterinarian/lawyer/superstar/actress, all the adults would laugh and think she was so cute. To Yuffie though, this was real, she was serious about being ballerina/veterinarian/lawyer/superstar/actress, as was any other kid. And so we took our first step and graduated from preschool. In that simple and very small act we thought it was a huge leap and that we were so much closer to our dreams. Maybe that was because we ourselves were so much smaller in comparison to our accomplishments.

However - as I'm sure you have already experienced - as we get older our minds narrow and change. We get brainwashed and that child dies so we conform. We turn into some brain dead, gum popping, music blowing, rebellious, ass crack. We say we want to go to college and become (insert generic occupation here) when really we just couldn't wait to get out of the nest, brilliant or not so brilliant.

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* * *

**

Living with Roxas for the first few weeks was… interesting. He was still trying to convince himself that it was just temporary and he would move back in with Hayner, the boy he had been living with before, when he broke up with his girlfriend. The kid didn't even unpack. Which was the complete opposite of me. I was relieved to be out of Yuffie's house. I planned to keep Roxas here as long as I could. Whether he was in a cult, gang life, druggie, or just a freak, I needed a roomie. And roomies were hard to come by for me. So I was quite pleasant living there, I was so happy I could probably have fucking puked rainbows.

So Roxas and I put together all our dishes, towels, and furniture. I fortunately got to keep the horrendous but overstuffed and comfy armchair. All of Roxas' dishes and towels matched in a nice array of browns and deep reds. Mine were quite awfully mixed together. But I don't think Roxas seemed to really care much. It was probably just a bunch of parting gifts his mother got him before he left. That and his _luxurious_ 1994 Honda Accord sitting in the lot in front of the apartment.

At first I thought Roxas was afraid of me, which gave me man giggles on the inside. He was always either in his room doing some sort of college things that normal college students do, or away. He was always away, always out somewhere. That was one of the first things I had noticed after living with him. Well actually I first noticed that he ate a lot, but you get what I mean. And whenever we were passing through in this small apartment it was as if he was doing a dance around me. Always remaining two feet away at all times. I take a step forward; he doesn't take a step back, but a leap to the side. As if to remove himself completely.

The truth is, I wasn't just thinking it, Roxas truly was frightened of me.

* * *

A neighborhood that was about 30 minutes from the city was having a garage sale, and as I have said, money is money and a sale's a sale. So I dragged Roxas all the way out here to rummage through Kermit the frog purses, Chuck Norris posters, old Easter decorations, used Barbies and her uniped boyfriend Ken.

It was funny. No matter how many Barbies they had at each garage sale, there was only one Ken. What a pimp huh?

"What difference does it make?" Roxas said nonchalantly and shrugged his shoulders.

"Call it curiosity or male bonding. I don't care. Just answer my question."

He remained waiting on the side walk as I mulled around a table looking for anything that might just catch my eye.

"Well why don't you tell me first."

I just shrugged as well before saying "A rocket scientist." I could hear him snicker behind my back. He probably thought I was joking. Not like I cared. It didn't happen and I didn't really expect if ever would. "Your turn."

He sighed and said "When I was little," he drawled the words like he was still trying to remember as if it was eons ago, when really he looked like he was in the 9th grade just yesterday. "…I wanted to be an anchorman."

"And now you're studying to be…"

"Nothing important." He ushered quickly before changing the subject. "Find anything?"

"Nah lets blow this popsicle stand." I would have pressed on but the way he had said it told me I should just leave it be.

We were at about our 15th house when he saw it. A cheap little circular table that was barely four feet wide with a black and white checkered top sat under a pile of old worn out paperback books. A dining table to sum it up, and Roxas apparently thought that we were I need of one.

Because I didn't see the use of it I most likely would have let him buy it on his own. That's what I would have done to anyone, but I chipped in anyway. It was hard trying to ignore the excitement that he tried so earnestly to hide. So with the checkered table folded and under arm with groceries in each hand we decided to turn in.

We set it up in our kitchen area. There wasn't a whole lot of room in there anyway but somehow it just fit in and might I add it was pretty swank there. That night we tested it out with the artery clogging Chinese food across the block. Of course we didn't have any chairs so Roxas and I made note to get some. Instead we dragged over some milk crates, which really didn't help much but it was the principle of the matter. Ya' know?

Dinner was the only time of day I saw Roxas anyway. I went to work and to come back and he's still at school. Then when he did finally come home he would have to leave in a few hours for work anyways. Even on days when he didn't have school I would hardly get to see him. Always gone remember?

So that Saturday night was pretty rare and dare I say awkward. Roxas had today off of work and I pretty much did nothing anyways. Although I did manage to take on a second job. Yes that's right, Axel the super… erm… employee. That's not lame at all. Where? Oh just as a waiter at some greasy diner called Holly's. Which was ran by two stout and just as equally greasy brothers whose sister's name was Holly… They must _really _love their sister. But as greasy as the food and brothers were, it was pretty nice, for a diner that is.

Now that were off topic let me revert it back to mine and Roxas' Saturday night. Yeah awkward, like I said. I was sitting in my ugly chair and Roxas was lying on the floor as we watched the TV Roxas brought with him. His mind was off somewhere else though; I couldn't blame him after our third _Friends_ rerun.

"Ey, Francis," he nodded. He didn't even try to correct his name. I'd probably say something idiotic like 'Take me right now, Roxas! Screw me hard!' in an overdone dramatic voice. But I thought otherwise, his reaction would either be brutal or he might not even notice at all. So in the end I just pulled out my cell phone and mindlessly started taking pictures of him. Well not _**of**_ him, they were merely shots that he just so happened to be in.

Yeah.

I didn't even notice what I was taking pictures of; just having the power to press buttons was all it takes to entertain me. Mindlessly capturing the room and erasing each one.

However my thumb froze over the button as it caught my attention. Studying the screen there was something that might not be anything at all. Two big blue eyes stared past the camera cutting through the darkness in the room, his extra spastic hair was outlined by dull blue light cast from the TV, and the rest was too dark to make out.

Finally looking past my camera I saw Roxas studying me as well. Absentmindedly I hit the save button and flipped my phone close.

I stared back at him expecting him to say something. The room was dark and besides the TV drawling buzz all you could here was our breathing. Soft and steady. Then his expression changed, raising one eyebrow and giving me a quizzical look before turning back to face the TV. And if it wasn't for the dim lighting I could have sworn he was smirking.

When I awoke on Sunday morning Roxas was gone, doing whatever he usually does. After showering and getting dressed in my uniform for Holly's I poured a bowl of fruit loops and sat on the nonexistent chairs at our checkered table. Not really feeling like eating I stirred the grimy cereal watching it plop back into the milk casting droplets onto the table. I was busy making pictures out of the ugly tan linoleum tiled floor of the kitchen when I glanced at the clock and decided it was time to go to work.

I threw on my green windbreaker and hurried my steps to the door just as someone on the other side knocked. I prayed to god it wasn't another neighbor with a green bean casserole or some other slightly disturbing dish.

I swung the heavy door open to find a boy around Roxas' age wearing camouflaged shorts and a crap load of gel in his hair.

"Hey, does Roxas live here?"

"Yeeeeeees." I dragged it out and gave him a peculiar look. He looked back at me expectantly so I said: "Sorry but he's not here right now."

He huffed and mumbled "Just like him…" and some other stuff that was incoherent. "Will you tell him I stopped by?"

"Yeah sure, but I don't think I caught your name."

"Oh sorry, it's Hayner." He introduced himself proudly beating a fist on his breast once.

I cracked an impish grin on my face. "So you're the one who drove Roxas out of his apartment."

"What? No, he –"

"Sure, sure." I turned around and motioned for him to come in. He looked around the apartment timidly before stepping inside. "Are you just gonna stand there uselessly or will you shut the damn door?"

He quickly shut the door, heat rising in his cheeks. Making people squirm was what I did best. I collapsed into the couch, I knew I should be getting to work about now but there was no chance I was going to pass up this opportunity. Hayner made his way to the living room and sat edgily in my armchair.

"So what called you over?"

"I have a few boxes of stuff that Roxas left at our old apartment. Thought he would miss it."

"Hmmm," I let my eyes rack over him before standing. "You want anything to drink?"

He shook his head. His eyes followed me to the kitchen, evaluating me. Judging by his expression he wasn't quite sure what to make of me. I poured myself a glass of water before returning to my seat.

"How long have you known Roxie?"

"Roxie?" he laughed at the nickname. "We've been friends since our freshman year."

"Of college?"

"High school."

I nodded. They must have been pretty close, which struck me as odd. If they were so close then why did a girl come between them? I almost laughed out loud seeing how similar it was to my own situation. But I kept my mouth shut, I didn't want to leave him with the impression that Roxas was living with some sadistic freak. Though the sadistic part was true.

"Who's the girl?" I asked swirling the water in my glass. He looked at me odd before answering.

"Oh, Olette."

"And did you meet _her _in college?" I didn't mean to sound so bitchy but this just felt too much like Larxene.

"Actually…" he paused and his eyes dropped to the floor. "She's been friends with Roxas since they were kids."

A mental light bulb flickered on. So _that's_how it is_._ "Lemme guess, Roxas liked **her **but **she **liked **you**. Which is why Roxas was so bothered by your PDA?"

"Wait, what? What are you talking 'bout?" he furrowed his eyebrows giving me a confused stare. I sent him a questioning look, he started to say "That's not why…" but thought better of it and asked: "How exactly do you know Roxas?"

"Ooooh," my voice was thick with amusement and a wicked grin played out onto my lips. "We go way way waaaaaay back."

"Hayner?" the boy's head turned to see who had called his name. I didn't bother, Roxas' voice was unforgettable.

Keeping my stare on Hayner I slyly put in "Fuck buddies ya' know?"

Later that night Roxas and I were doing dishes, a rare moment might I add. He scrubbed, because he couldn't stand how I cleaned the dishes. I rinsed and dried. There was a tiny window right above the sink. Looking out you could see the large building across the street in the red glare of the sunset.

Roxas had been giving me the silent treatment all evening and finally decided he was mature enough to deal with me.

"I can't believe you told him that!"

"Aw, but did you see his expression. Priceless."

"No, Axel. It wasn't funny. Do you know how much shit you could put me in with lies like that?"

"Yes I do, and that's exactly what makes it worth while."

"You're an ass," he spat out. His eyes were hard on the plate he was washing, scrubbing with the little green sponge ferociously.

"Hey, not my fault you like my ass."

Roxas sighed exasperated a tint of pink in his cheeks. I chuckled a little and bumped my hip into his. Stumbling to the side he tore off the yellow glove throwing it at my face. I took off my own and threw it back at him. Both covered in bubbles he store at me deeply agitated.

His cheeks were red with anger, soapy water clung to his hair and one of the rubber gloves had land lopsided over his hair. I guess I probably looked just as stupid because we both began to laugh at how ridiculously childish we were.

**

* * *

**

My boss from Holly's had called wondering where the hell I was. So I made up a lie about my dear auntie Agatha escaping from the mental asylum and that my cell was out of minutes. He probably didn't buy it, but I didn't expect him to. He just gave me a warning and said 'Well auntie Agatha better not escape _again_'. By the way he said it I knew that he knew this wasn't going to be the last time she'd be loose.

Celebrating my ability to hold a job Xigbar, a few of his buddies, and I went out drinking. Picked up a few chicks and I'm sure you can guess the rest. I made it back to my apartment just as the day was beginning. I called in sick at Starbucks and spent the rest of the day in bed.

At about three there was a knock on my bedroom door. I pulled my burgundy comforter over my head and told them to go away. Roxas came in anyways though.

"I'm going to the grocery store you want anything?"

I moaned incoherently into my sheets.

"I wonder how you are oh so suave _all _the time." He mocked.

"It's an Axel thing," I smirked into folds of blanket.

It was silent and I turned to see if he was still in the doorway but alas he was gone. I finally got up and left for Holly's before Roxas had even gotten back.

Today only me and Wakka waited tables. Tuesdays were never particularly busy. Most of the day I just sat there and drank the most disgusting coffee I have ever had the misfortune to consume. At about 5 PM, as usual, Richie and Ellen arrived and ordered their usual.

Richie and Ellen have been coming to Holly's at 5PM every weekday since it first opened. In fact they have actually been going to this diner before it was even sold to the brothers and named Holly's. They were just a cute couple with a rather tragic or romantic background, which ever you prefer.

You could be possibly disturbed by the fact that Ellen was at least 10 years older then Richie, but let me explain. Ellen had a husband and kids long ago, way before Richie. When her husband suffered a stroke and died when she was 40 she had never remarried. Richie had been friends with her through this process. They had actually started going to the diner together sometime after her husband's death. She claimed it helped her deal. Then when she was 70 and he 60 they got married. But not really out of romantics but as friends. And being as old as they were the age gap didn't seem all that odd. Now at 70 and 80 years old they are still strong, health-wise and relationship-wise. It was like a relationship in reverse.

Of course while Ellen spieled about the entire story in her weary voice I kept imagining me and Xigbar growing old together and finally marrying. But even then there were so many things wrong with this picture. It was already likely that one of us would at least die by the age of 35 or receive the death penalty for something or other. Also as gay marriage was illegal in Washington and if it was possible that we'd live long enough for that to change I don't think Xigbar would be all too faithful. Besides who on earth could bare a lifetime with _Xigbar_?

Well there's that and the fact that I'm not gay.

I turned away from the old couple just as the bells rang and a new costumer walked in. He was short, blonde, and more or less:

Roxas.

"Hey there!" I strode over to him. He turned to see me, his eyes were wide and he kept glancing out the windows a bit paranoid.

"Can I stay here and walk you home when your shifts over?"

"Okaaaay…" My eyebrows furrowed at him. "What's going on?" I leaned over to see what could possibly be out on the street to bother him so.

"It's nothing… Just some guys from school." I smirked at him… He's getting bullied in college? Strangely it was almost cute. I blamed Roxas' feminine side.

"And why are these big bad guys following you? Come now, I'm sure you're not _that _attractive."

He huffed at me, his cheeks turning a slight strawberry shade. "They're just pissed 'cause I get A's while the rest of the class fails." I waved at him as I got back to work.

"Stay, go, I don't care."

He slid into a booth on the far side of the diner starring out the window. He only looked up at me once to thank me for the coffee.

About an hour or two later me and Roxas were walking down the block side by side, my coat draped over one shoulder.

"Eesssss club! Gonna show you hooow!" I sang the melody _very _out of key. Roxas jabbed me in the ribs blushing at the strange looks people gave us as we walked by.

"Can you _please_ contain yourself?!"

"Not a fan of S-Club 7?" His expression was confused and he looked up at me precariously.

I laughed at him at first before things got really serious. "You're kidding right? S-Club 7 ya' know!" He just rolled his eyes at me thinking I was most likely insane or on the verge of schizophrenia. "Oh. My. God." I could only stand there and gap at him. "How 'bout the Spice Girls, You _have_ to know the Spice Girls!"

"Well duh. Who didn't know about those diva whores?"

"You tell me? How could someone **not** know S-Club 7!" He shrugged his shoulders and I sighed giving up on him. "Ya' know, I wonder what ever happened to them? It's almost sad."

Roxas laughed at me obviously not understanding the gist of things.

"C'mon think about it. One second you're on top of the world and working your way to fame with your friends. Then you find out your friends aren't really much of friends at all and your managers a greedy bastard and then what? Your life just crumbles. Every lie you've ever told yourself breaks and all you can do is sit and watch." I looked to him but he just looked at me perplexed and nonplused. "It's like when you built a tower so high when you were a kid and you place the last block on it but everything becomes unbalanced and it starts to fall. And all you can do is sit and watch it."

He didn't answer. He was too put off by what random crap that came out of my mouth. Then he asked something I didn't really suspect. Nothing serious nothing deeply thought out and intelligent. But something so simple and trivial yet so confusing at the same time, that no one would have expected because no one should have bothered to ask.

"What do you do then?"

I was stunned into silence. How the hell was I supposed to know? I tried to think of a reasonable answer and then finally turned to him and said in a quiet voice: "I don't know Roxas." And hoped that would suffice.

* * *

It was Friday night and I had Saturday off, so what was I to do around here? Roxas was at school because he led the most boring life I know. And my ol' pal Luxord was usually my life saver on such dull nights… No! Jeezes! Not like that…

I thought for a while to call up Rikku or Demyx… buuuuut decided against it in the end. I wasn't quite up for their hyperactivities tonight. So I continued to sit there bored, flicking the side of my cheek making a delightful popping noise. The TV's volume was low and even though I pretended to watch it with my eyes scanning the screen my mind was vague and elsewhere.

Still bored out of my mind I decided I might as well ring up Xigbar and see if he was still in town and it was one of those odd coincidences when your about to call someone but they call you first. Yeah…

"Hello?"

"_Hey Axel!!!"_ He said in his drunken voice.

"You need a ride don't you?" That was a no brainer.

I pulled up to the curb in my pickup at the address he had given to me over the phone. I honked the horn once, then at least three more times. In the end I had to go physically drag is drunken .15% BAC level ass out on the yard. He stumbled a bit laughing hoarsely in my ear. The great thing about Xigbar though was he was fun drunken whether you were sober or not.

"And then she said _NUH UH!!! _So I was like _BITCH SAY WHAT!! _And so he came and…." His mumbling led off quite abruptly as his attention was pulled beyond the window. He watched the rain drops intensely as they were pulled down the side. And even though he was very, excuse me, _**very**_ drunk I thought for a moment he might say something insightful. Instead he fogged up the window with his breath and promptly drew pictures with his tongue.

I turned away from him shaking my head thinking what a moron I was. Xigbar was a freeloader druggie I shouldn't ever really expect anything from him. Most cases I would usually laugh at how much of an idiot Xigbar was, I would tell him so too. But as the rain beat down tonight unmercifully I just wasn't up for his antics. I just wanted to get away, away from everyone normal living the life not wanting anything more. This was odd because for the longest time I assumed that there was nothing more for me.

I guess Xigbar was growing rather bored with me and tried to kill me off because while my mind was wandering his hand suddenly tugged on one side of the steering wheel. My truck swerved on the slick road in the dark. I immediately swiped his hand away and steered us towards our proper lane, when the back stopped fishtailing I pulled in at the nearest gas station.

"Out!" I commanded him. He store at me blankly for a while, either he couldn't tell if I was being serious, or he was just too intoxicated to understand me. "Out!" I repeated, this time pointing my finger at the door.

"Wuddem I Supposeda doo?"

"I don't know. I don't care. Call a cab, just get out." He cursed at me a bit and gave me a rather rude hand gesture before he slinked out of the cab of the truck. He watched me drive away with an incredulous look as the rain beat on his jacket illuminated by the orange neon lights from the gas station.

Maybe that was an irresponsible thing to do, just let Xigbar wander around and find his own way home. Not on Xigbar's part of course, but letting him terrorize the village. Or maybe it was pretty smart of me. I'm pretty sure it was the former but I'd like for once to just say I made a wise decision, so we'll go with that.

Still regretting leaving him at the gas station I pulled into his parking space at his apartment, his car obviously still at the party. I waited for him to come back home and mulled over whether I should go pick him up or not. Guilt wasn't something all too familiar to me so when I saw a little 1994 Honda Accord heading down the road all thoughts of Xigbar were banished. I roared my truck to life and pulled out just behind him, I was going to find out where my roomie daringly ventured to every day. I probably should have stopped and wondered if I was invading his privacy, I probably should have pondered over the fact that Roxas just might be very irritated with my actions. However that whole stop, drop, and roll rule was never part of my system, I just plunged head first into the swimming pool.

I followed him all the way across town through a maze of Seattle. At first I thought he was on to me and trying to lose me but then he was getting into the less ghetto neighborhoods of Seattle, all the way up to Richville. It suddenly daunted on me that he was very possibly visiting his family. He did this everyday, all day? Visited his family? The pieces didn't fit right so I continued to follow him.

It wasn't long before Roxas pulled into a driveway of a very nice house. I drove past and pulled in the neighbor's driveway and ducked down hoping he had not spotted my (absolutely fucking awesome) red hair yet. He stepped out of his car his umbrella swooshed open quickly and he darted up the steps ignoring the blooming garden. When the door opened there was an older woman fitting a mother role. Her blonde hair was much like Roxas'. She was smiling and unsurprised by his arrival, she gestured someone from inside to come to the door. A boy appeared, a boy much like Roxas except for his wild Brown hair.

His eyes though, just as stunning as Roxas' own, just as beautiful, but with so much less life. They were glazed and never met the blonde's gaze. He stood awkwardly leaning against the woman yet seeming unaware of her. Roxas took his hand and led him inside. The woman shut the door, shutting me out.

And just as quick as she had shut that very door, a cold tension ran through me. Something telling me that I shouldn't be here, I shouldn't have been there to begin with.

* * *

"What happened last night man?"

"Sorry Xig, something important came up."

"So you left me at a gas station?"

"I know that was a pretty bat shit thing for me to do-"

"An employee woke me up when he found me sleeping next to the slurpy machine"

"Life's just tough sometimes."

"Ch-yeah."

* * *

On Sunday, bright and early Roxas and I shared a shift at Starbucks. Sundays were pretty busy around noon when all the churches got out, or the youth wanted to regroup and whatever nonsensical shit like that. Roxas was working the register while Rikku and I worked the espresso machine.

The line was gruelingly long; Rikku's and my cheeks were both flushed from running back and forth.

"Short triple shot Americano, Tall White Mocha, and Tall Caramel Macchiato!" I called out as a slapped the three drinks onto the counter and quickly applied the lids. I was becoming quite the pro. A group mulled over to collect their orders and I went back to work on the next batch.

The crowd was becoming agitated and Roxas' fingers stumbled over the buttons at the register in a panic. That angry church people hissed and growled from the back right up to the front. Roxas wasn't handling the pressure very well; sweat was beading his forehead now.

"Switch with me, I'll handle them," I whispered to him. He nodded and I gently pushed him out of the way to take the order of the balding man in front. His ruddy face was irritated as he looked onto me disappointingly. I just smiled at this fugly man and took his order.

"That'll be $12.35" I said taking the man's money. The next ten minutes went by easier the crowd was still tense and ready to pounce like lions but we were able to hold them at bay. Coffee services just could never get any slack, oh the drama!

I was still working the register when I heard a restrained "Shit!" hissed through clenched teeth. Roxas had spilt the woman with the faux fur coat's Latte all over his lap. His brown corduroys were drenched in the hot and sticky substance and his expression was none to pretty.

"Rikku!" I called her over to take the register and grabbed Roxas by the collar of his shirt and dragged him to the back.

"Take those off." He didn't argue and slung off the pants quite viciously. His upper thighs were red and burning. I wrapped ice in two towels and slapped em on his legs.

I took the first aid kit from the shelf to give to him and said: "Stay here."

I'm sure a pant-less male using the dish towels as ice packs was probably against regulations, that's why it will stay our little secret.

After the crowd was over except for a couple by the window, and all people were served did I finally check up on Roxas.

He sat with his back against the wall in his blue striped boxers. Each hand pressed a towel full of ice to his inner thigh and lap. The ugly hazardous yellow first aid kit lay against him, its contents strewn across the floor.

"How do they look?" He hadn't noticed me and jumped when I knelt next to him. The heat rose in his cheeks embarrassed by his condition.

Pulling his fists away he hissed and said "I dunno," and meekly stared at the small bright red blisters along his thighs.

I hissed and grimaced at the sight. "We're gonna have to take you to the hospital."

On the way there I stopped at the apartment to get a clean pair of khaki shorts for Roxas. The drive was silent with the radio at a low hum. He held his thighs gingerly wincing at the way the shorts rubbed him. He had taken the time to wrap them in gauze before he left but it didn't provide much protection. When we arrived he filled out some papers as I looked at old lady's magazines.

"Rrrroxas Nilsen?"

He raised a hand wearily and stood, his teeth clenched for an aching second.

"Be a man," I patted him on the back as he stiffly made his way to the back with the nurse. I watched him leave and began to detest the loneliness and sterile feeling of the hospital.

My isolated wait seemed endless and when Roxas did finally come out, his pained expression had not waned. For an instant though I could have sworn there was a hint of a smile when his searching eyes found my own. Of course I may just be delusional.

"Oh, you waited," he murmured trying not to meet my eyes.

"Yeah… You thought I would just leave?"

"I might've," he gave a shameful smile, and oh god, I never wanted to hug a person more. I would have eaten him up right there, wait…

I didn't just say that.

I drove the car around to pick him up; we had taken Roxas' Honda. As he took the passenger seat he bit his lip at every small movement and clenched his eyes shut. That face was just... just so fuckable.

No, I didn't say that either.

I blushed at my thoughts and slanted my gaze out my window trying to avoid looking at him. "So eh," I cleared my throat, "what did the doc say?"

"Oh, just a second degree burn-"(1)

"Just a second degree burn!" I nearly stomped on the breaks but thought otherwise as we sped up to beat the yellow light.

It was Roxas' turn to blush and glance out the window. "It's really nothing. I was just reckless."

"So what do we have to do to get you all better?"

"We?"

"What?"

He stared at me blankly for a minute, as if he was trying to understand something but then shook all thoughts away. "I just have to keep changing the gauze and rewrap it every night. I can't get it wet though."

Well that was going to make showering difficult. "What about work?"

"I guess I can't really go until I can walk again."

I nodded and the rest of the drive was in silence.

I threw the keys onto the checkered table before rifling through the cupboards for more gauze. Roxas threw himself onto the couch and muffled a long groan into the pillow. I found the gauze and made my way into the living room before resting on the armchair across from him.

He turned his face towards me sporting an angry pout and pink cheeks. I chuckled at the expression.

"Whaaaaat?" He complained. I just shook my head and looked down at the gauze still wearing a smile. He rested his chin on the armrest and said: "School's gonna be a bitch."

"Mmmmm," I agreed.

"Well," he stood up much to fast and paid the price.

"Geez sit down, I'm hurting just looking at you. Besides we should probably change that bandage." I took a seat next to him and motioned for him to remove his pants.(2)

His face lit up a bright shade of red, he pushed me away quickly "I can do it by myself!"

"Nonsense, I saw how you did it the first time, it'll never heal that way." I tugged on one side of the shorts, and if I thought Roxas couldn't have gotten redder I was wrong.

"N-no Axel, its fine!"

He was being difficult for no reason. What was he so worried about? I glared at him and he returned the glare.

We sat there for nearly a whole minute. Him glaring at me glaring at him. Then I shook my head and smirked. I might as well try a different method. So I inched myself as close to him as possible. His round eyes looked up at me in a dumbstruck manner. My lips were less than a centimeter from his ear. He shivered under my cool breath.

"You can either cooperate oooor," I whispered in a low husky voice, "I can rip those pants off you. One, of course, will hurt more than the other."

Roxas nodded, he was starring at the ground intently just as red as ever. I heard him begin to unzip his pants and I let out a low chuckle. I felt him shiver again.

"Good boy." I let my lips brush his ear for a mere second before pulling away. He avoided my gaze and concentrated on removing his pants without causing any pain. I smirked at my accomplishment, a bit happy with myself at the moment. Once they were gone I pulled Roxas's legs up onto the couch and position myself between' them.

"W-what are y-you doing?" He said finally making eye contact.

"Well how else am I supposed to wrap you?" He nodded and tried to ignore how sensual our position was. I removed the wrapping as quickly and gently as possibly trying not to pain him. "This may hurt a bit," I mentioned as I started the new wrap. He hissed between his teeth and threw his head back.

"Aa-aah," he groaned.

I tried to hide my own blush, but seeing Roxas shrivel under me groaning in what could be either pain or pleasure sent a sensation into my body. A new thrill. Something I had never felt with any girl.

Nonetheless I had to keep myself under control and finish the task at hand.

Easier said then done…

When I had finished and Roxas' panting had finally stopped was I able to calm my nerves.

"You better?"

He shook his head no. The pink was starting to fade from his cheeks at last. "I think I might go call-" He tried to stand but I pulled him back down gently.

"I called work already, they know."

"Oh," he looked to me sheepishly. "Uh thanks for, eh, helping me today." I shook my head dismissing it. Neither of us talked but stared at each other rather blankly.

I can't say I knew what was going on his mind. I can't say I ever really knew what really goes on in that mind. Roxas was in his own, himself, and maybe what happened that night was really what destroyed him or maybe what had saved him.

"Roxas I," I moved in closer. I rested one hand on the back of the couch and one on the cushion so I was hovering over him, nudging myself between his legs. "just want to-"

"A-Axel," he said. Not questioningly, but almost as if he was accepting me. Almost as if he saw what was coming before I did. His eyes did not stray from mine. Our faces just inches apart, our breathing heavy. The air between us was thick and unsure.

"Try some…" I could no longer finish that sentence. My voice and limbs were weak. I was intoxicated with him, he coursed through my veins so thoroughly I could no longer control myself. My lips glided with his for a second, I paused making sure it was okay. He did not pull away, in fact he cupped my face and began to kiss me back. I held myself over him, kissing intensely and bit his lips. He scrunched his face as if he was in pain. A pain I couldn't understand at the time.

I worked my lips down his throat before he came back to reality. And god how I hate reality.

"N-no!" he pushed me away. "Th-this isn't right!" I couldn't do anything but watch him squirm under me in fear.

"We're both guys, this is…" He looked into my eyes searching for something.

"Wrong?"

He pushed me away forcefully and scampered down the hall into his bedroom. He promptly then slammed the door behind him.

I rubbed my face with one hand exhausted. I laughed to myself for a while before flipping on the TV.

And smirking I murmured "G'night Roxie."

* * *

(1) Yes it is possible to get second degree bruns from coffee, I've seen it.

(2) How on earth do you motion for someone to take off their pants? 'Cuase I'd do it to everyone in public and see how they respond.

Thanks so much for reading!!! Reviews are really appreaciated!!


	4. Coldplay

A/N: I do not own Kingdom Hearts

Yuuuurp, got another chapter out, much shorter than the last two. If you are still reading this than thank you, thank you, tank you! I've revised teh entire plot to make it a little more original... or so I hope.

Well, Enjoy!

* * *

"C'mon Axel, just take them!" the mullet man was practically screaming at the top of his lungs now. The coffee shop was empty in the middle of the day, which hardly ever occurred, and I was here stuck with this annoyingly, sufferable, totally born in the wrong era, ADD influenced child. His hands waved dramatically as he debated his side of the topic. "You could take a girl, a nice pretty girl with you!" I turned to him only raising an eyebrow before dusting off the coffee cups again. "For the love of god Axel its _Coldplay!_Two _free_tickets to see Coldplay!"

"Demyx what am I going to do with two tickets to see a band I don't even like. Why are you trying to give them to me in the first place? It's because I'm so charming huh?" I waggled my eyebrows in his direction.

He rolled his eyes and sighed. "I already explained it to you! I was going to ask that girl to go see it with me but then suddenly she's going on a family vacation and wants me to tag along, don't you see this is my _chance_to appeal to her folks. I've been trying to get these tickets off my hands but no one will take them, and it's a shame to let them go to waste." He looked up at me pleadingly with eyes full of utter innocence, and let me tell you, when Demyx pulls that face you better bring down the big guns or else you're doomed.

"Demyx, really, I don't have any need-"

"Axeeeeel!" He drawled out my name in a whiny voice like any 6-year-old would do.

Sighing, I glared at him and said: "Fine."

He gave a great "Huzzah!" before latching himself to my body in a breathless hug. With my arms pinned to my sides I glared down at that bizarre hair of his and sighed. "Thanks a million Axel!"

"Hands off pea brain!" I elbowed at his chest trying to wedge him off. Still smiling he retreated to the other side of the counter before I could slug him one. I groaned trying to come up with and idea to get these off my own hands now, and also come up with a special way to attack Demyx when he least expected it.

"Don't you have something better to do then annoy me while I'm working?"

He just shrugged and smiled. "Well I thought I'd drop by and see how the gang was doing. Where's Kairi? Isn't she supposed to be on this shift with you?"

"Who knows, not like it's going to be busy today anyways. So why don't you just run along and leave me to my solitude?" And my sanity.

With that Demyx left in a hurried rush claiming to have forgotten something which was just so Demyx of him. I looked down at the tickets in my hand frowning miserably. It's not like I didn't want to go, sure I didn't like Coldplay all that much, but who would I take? Xigbar left once again on some business trip like always, I couldn't bring Kairi or Rikku unless I wanted to experience rape of some sort, and Roxas has been avoiding me for quite some time. I jammed the tickets into my pocket angry at how much they made me feel like such a loser and went back to dusting off the shelves.

I opened the door to my apartment later that night catching the phone just as it began to ring. I threw my keys aside to the checkered table and made a mad dash for the phone.

"Yello!" I answered.

"Axel!" I groaned under my breath hearing the familiar squeal of Rikku.

"Hey there…" I opened the fridge pulling out the orange juice container and took a big gulp straight from the carton.

"Listen, I was just heading to a party. It's at my friend Pain's house, you should totally come!"

I thought over it for a while, it's true I haven't been to a party in forever and it would be a nice break. Not to mention I had no work tomorrow so what was the harm?

"Sure thing, just give me the address and I'll be there." I scribbled down her address on a used napkin and looked up just as Roxas came through the door. He jumped at the sound of my loud voice still a little put off from the other night.

Smirking I caught her attention again. "Heeeeey, Rikku you don't mind if I bring a friend right?"

I pulled up to the house and parked on the curb across the street. Roxas sat in the passenger seat of my truck glumly looking at the shit hole we were about to enter. I grinned widely and patted his leg.

"All set and ready?" Parties were the best, and if Pain was anywhere near as hot as Rikuu this was going to be an interesting night.

"Axel I told you I didn't want to come!" Roxas retorted as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Aww don't be such a chick!" I ruffled his hair and he shrunk back away from my touch. "This'll be fun; you can sit out here all night, go in with me, or find your own way home. Your choice." I hopped out of the cab and locked my door and started jogging up across the street.

I heard the car door slam and soft foot steps following me. Smirking I turned to him waiting. He ignored me and we walked up to the house together. Rikku was quick to answer the door wearing some slutty little black dress that barely covered anything.

"Good you finally came!" She exclaimed and grabbed my wrist pulling me in, in turn I grabbed Roxas' dragging him right behind me. The house was just as shitty as the outside but the music was amazing. There were no rooms untouched by the violent vibrations and unnecessarily loud music.

"Pain, this is Axel, Axel this is Pain!" Rikku showed me to a chick with short hair wearing all leather looking pretty tuff… T-U-F-F tuff. That's not to say she wasn't attractive though slightly butch. I was handed a half full cup of beer that Rikku had been drinking out of and I quickly finished.

"Oh so you brought… Roo… Rocky?" Rikku turned her gaze down to Roxas slightly disappointed. Roxas however was to busy clinging to my sleeve and avoiding the flailing dancers to correct his name. I chuckled a bit and ruffled his hair.

"Yeah I thought it would be kind of me to get this little munchkin a life." They laughed but Roxas glared and rolled his eyes. He quickly turned and walked away making his way to what might have been the kitchen. My eyes followed him but quickly darted back to Pain as she began to speak.

"So how do you know Rikku?" She grimaced after sizing me up and taking a sip of her beer.

"Er… work actually." I looked back towards the kitchen growing slightly worried about Roxas.

"Ah so you work at that crack Coffee shop too?" she snickered obviously not hiding her dislike for me.

"_Actually, _there is a reason why it's called Starbucks, you know that whale book about the…" When my gaze set back to Pain she had disappeared. Well there goes one hottie for the night, but I was sure there was plenty more.

I began my journey towards the kitchen hoping to save poor Roxie from what ever dangers and sleeping dragons that might lay there. I was half way there when a soft, small hand caught my elbow.

"Axel?"

I turned obviously to see who I knew that could be at this party. But I regretted it as soon as I did and my stomach did a million flip flops and felt as if there were a thousand flaming butterflies within it. "…Yuna…" I said flatly with a forced smile.

"What… what are you doing here?"

"You know just prowling." She chuckled a bit but I grimaced at the soft music like laugh of hers that swallowed me whole. I dug my hands into my pockets. "You a friend of Pain's?"

"Sort of, I mean as friendly as Pain gets." She gave me that winning smile and my heart lurched forward. "You know Pain too?"

"Ah no, Rikku invited me, I work with her." I smiled back and she nodded. "So how have you been doing?"

"Good… good." She nodded at her own words with a half smile then frowned as she looked into her drink. "Terrible actually." She looked back at me with a now hopeful expression and reached up to caress my cheek. "It's hard to find someone like you again." She pulled away before I could even respond. "Maybe you and I should see each other again sometime. It would be fun, well I'll leave you be." Yuna walked off swaying her hips just like she used to and I wanted to run after her so badly. But I knew this was a bad idea. This was Yuna; it didn't work the first time it certainly wasn't going to work this time.

I turned sharply shaking my head to catch sight of Roxas sitting on top of the counter chatting with some broad shouldered guy and sipping a beer. The older boy's hand rested softly on Roxas' knee and was leaning in a bit too close for my liking.

"Hey there…" I growled unpleasantly and strode next to Roxas and this unfamiliar boy.

Roxas smiled to me and motioned to the guy "This is my new friend Lexaeus."

I could smell the alcohol so heavy on his breath and I reached to take the cup away from him but Roxas pulled it away with a whine. He definitely had too much. Instead I settled my hand on Roxas lower back. "C'mon Roxie lets go."

"It's Roxas Axel, ROXAS! And we just got here," he frowned but looked back at Lexaeus who seemed rather dense or maybe just quiet. "Besides, Lexaeus promised to take me for a ride on his Jaguar!"

I shook my head and looked to him dumbfounded. "That is NOT what you think it means Roxie, just c'mon." I grabbed his elbow and seized the cup from his hand as I roughly pulled him off the counter. Roxas responded with a glared and pulled away.

"I told you! It's ROXAS not Roxie, not Rox, and definitely NOT Francis!" He shouted loudly over the music drawing attention from the partiers in the kitchen. Roxas' face was flushed and his expression was sour like that of a child's. "I'm NOT going home with you. All you ever do is pick on me and make fun."

"_Roxas_ you're too intoxicated to understand what you're saying c'mon." I tugged at his sleeve yet again and replied with a softer voice but Roxas just wouldn't have it.

"And who was that?! Your girlfriend? Does she know you like to kiss boys?" those perfect blue eyes pierced me and I was struck dumbfounded. Had that kiss really bothered him so much? Sighing I took a step away.

"Fine don't come home with me. Stay here and get wasted. When this brute…" I looked towards Lexeaus, "No hard feelings." Then back to Roxas "starts to play with your ass hole you better give it all to him you little prick." I wasn't completely sure what in Roxas' words had pushed the wrong buttons but I stormed from the kitchen and out of the house. I jammed the key into the ignition and blazed away back home.

Roxas didn't come back that night. I waited up all night and he never returned. Finally at seven the next morning did I catch him sneaking in. He wouldn't look at me, nor would he speak to me. I didn't have the time to deal with him so I got up and headed to Holly's at noon.

**

* * *

**

"Sounds like he got fucked in the ass real hard last night," snickered Wakka from across the diner as he wiped down some tables earning him some strange glances from the costumers.

"I guess. But Roxas was barely able to stand kissing me how would he be able to go through something like that?"

He shrugged and replied, "Well there was the alcohol, and apparently his hatred for you."

I rolled my eyes. "Gee thanks, I just want him to talk to me again…" My mind began to stray away.

"Why do you care so much about this kid? Up till now you've only been telling me about how you'd like to pull out the stick that's been up his ass. And now suddenly when he gets loose a little you begin to care? You don't have some sort of weird man crush do you?"

"No! No, of course it's not like that." I paused. "You don't think he was raped do you?" Wakka shrugged and returned to work as the last set of costumers decided to leave. Was Roxas afraid?

* * *

Once I had returned home I tore off my jacket and flung the keys to the table. Roxas' Honda was outside meaning he must have been here. I quickly strode up to his door and knocked once. There was no reply. I knocked several more times.

"Roxas!" There was a moan from inside and I slowly opened the door. "Roxas I'm coming in." I ducked as a magazine flew past my head.

"Get out!"

I frowned and clucked my tongue. "You okay Rox? I mean Roxas." I cautiously walked towards the lump on the bed.

"Everything hurts…"

I chuckled slightly "Well when one gets a big ol' fu-"

"I didn't sleep with him…"

I raised my eyebrows and sat on the edge of the bed. "Roxas what's up?" He ducked down further beneath the covers. There was no other response and I sighed. "Roxas it's fine, you can tell me."

He stayed beneath the comforter but mumbled out his reply "I was stupid last night…"

"Yeah I know…" I rolled my eyes again.

He peeked out from the top of his Ultramarine blue comforter at me. "I don't know. The alcohol and that Lex guy, and you were talking to those girls… It made me mad."

Oh boy… "Roxas what happened after I left?" Just at the question his eyes began to water and he almost looked like he wanted to cry.

"We-we had some more drinks and… I was really trashed so Lex took me out too his car." He frowned and added in "It wasn't even a Jaguar." I smiled at his pout. "But I got in and he started to drive…"

"And where did he take you."

"I don't remember, he kept touching me though. His hand was on my knee then my thigh then…" He stopped looking elsewhere and I nodded. "He pulled into some vacant parking lot and climbed on top of me in the passenger seat." His voice was so small I was straining to hear him. "I told him to stop but he wouldn't, so I kicked him… I kicked him a lot, and then I ran."

And that was that. I didn't press for anymore information. I did however kick off my shoes and crawl into Roxas' single wide bed. He didn't freak or yell. He watched me questioningly but smiled at the comforting gesture and nuzzled into my shirt and drifted back off to sleep.

I don't know if I have a man crush or even why I bother with this kid. But something about this simple innocence of his just sucked me in. I tried to swim against the current, oh believe me I tried, but I was always pulled back. I guess I'm okay with that though.

I looked down at the small boy and gave a half smile. "Roxas?"

"Mmmm?"

"Do you like Coldplay?"


End file.
